Day Fifty Eight

Sent him off to work this morning with lots of hugs and kisses and an enthusiastic “have a good day!”  I also sent him a text later in the morning that read “I hope you have an amazing, stress free day today!  I love you!”  If I were a dog, I would have peed on him.  I wanted him to feel loved and appreciated so that if he saw her he wouldn’t want her.  Crazy.  I decided not to continue with the zoo farce, so I dropped it.  As I was driving to run errands I contemplated driving the 30 miles to his work to spy on them… the only thing that stopped me was the fact that my kids would have recognized his building and out me.  I am glad they stopped me, I would have reached a new crazy if they hadn’t.

He called me that afternoon to tell me he saw her.... for the first time since my second discovery day.  He had been standing in one of his employees offices when she rounded the corner, saw him there and said “oh, I’ll come back later” and left.  He finished his conversation then went up to his office to call me.  Good boy.  If only I had fully believed him and not pictured a secret rendevoux where they talked about their plans for the future all while f***ing eachother in a dirty broom closet.  But at least he called me.